Boo the boring Bachelor

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Will Arie Luyendyk fall in love? He hopes so. Photo by Daily Mail


 

It is the 22nd season of the Bachelor. 29 women blush over a 36 year old, grey haired man, who in the 8th season of the Bachelorette lost his dream girl, Emily. He is the most boring Bachelor, who doesn’t know the difference between a fun date and a snooze of an episode.

Arie Luyendyk is the Kissing Bandit and the newest Bachelor. He touches the women weirdly while he talks to them and takes their lipstick off too early. He is just the proof that the scandal that hit Bachelor in Paradise has hit every part of the brand. He doesn’t take them on cool dates like the past. For example, in Nick’s season a soft spoken midwestern, he took them to perform with the Backstreet Boys, a women’s dream. In Arie’s season he took them to the mountains and made them eat bugs. Even when he tried to do the GLOW women’s wrestling, he’s so boring and uncharming that the girls lost interest in the very cool experience and ended up with plenty of tears. I would rather watch paint dry than see Arie talk about him racing one more time. I’m not the only one, Reality Steve, Bachelor expert, says “Ari is the biggest dog they’ve ever cast as lead in Bachelor history. Good luck. He’s gonna need it.” We get it you used to drive in a circle, I want to hear about Sienne who has graduated from Yale and been all over the world. I want to hear from Kendall who has a weird obsession with dead animals.

There has been bad dates like when Kenny and Levi fought while on Rachel’s season or when Ben brought Amanda through the drive through at McDonalds. Those were awkward and made me want to fast forward, but overall the rest were great. Arie on his first one on one glamors up Rebecca with over $100,000 of clothes just to bring her to dance in front of a 3 piece band. I don’t care about how you dress her. He cares more about the materialism side of this than actually the experience. Another Horrible date was with Lauren S, the first girl to go home on a one on one. A mix of getting drunk at a winery and him being so in love with himself that he doesn’t like girls talking about himself it ended up being awkward and making me wish Arie was never asked to be on the show. The worst of all was having to see where he lived and his childhood videos. I don’t even care about my friends baby pictures I’m not going to care about your Arie. He needs more creativity otherwise after this show ends the woman who marries him will end up eating dinner at his parent’s house every weekend.

The Bachelor is saved by these incredible women. Tia, a funny girl with a southern drawl from Weiner, Arkansas adds the fun to the show. She is always laughing and having a good time. She is wife material, but too fun for Arie. Then there is Bekkah who is a 22 year old with a fiery attitude. She puts him in his place and on every group date she shines. Every person watching the show has a favorite on the show, and it’s never Arie. As this season continues Reddit has hope saying, “this is probably the most impressive group of girls they have had on this show ever. Which is needed because Arie is not a good Bachelor. Too bad one of these wonderful women have to end up with him.”

Arie went from getting dumped on the Bachelorette, to having a girlfriend who left him after a miscarriage, to choosing between beautiful women. Even though he doesn’t deserve it and no fans wanted to see him ever again he is our newest Bachelor. I feel like a fan of a bad sports team looking forward to next season.

Dom Dakovich, Staff Reporter

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